Random Thoughts

I love Saturday mornings when J is home with me. Usually I wake first and I feel this very real calmness. I'm aware of so much: his breathing, the color of the light peeking through my blinds, the contrast of his warm limbs snuggled up against me and the freezing temperature in the apartment. I'm so aware of everything and its the only time I can really take it all in with out the hub bub of every day life. And I'm so in love with him in the mornings. Probably because he's asleep.

I'm kidding.

Running is so much easier with a really good pair of thick, squishy socks. I just purchased a pair of thick-soled ankle socks and I swear, I can run the track much longer than usual. Its not my breathing or being tired that makes me stop. Its those pesky thin socks that rub the balls of my feet raw. Invest in squishy socks.

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night and really, really had to pee but you're just too sleepy to get up? So you go back to sleep and then in the morning you have to pee so bad that it hurts and you have to hobble leaning over at the waist to the bathroom just so you won't lose it?

Sorry if that was unlady like. Just wondered if I was the only one.

I'm a little torn about solicitors. At work, I hear my boss and co-worker say "I'm not interested," and BAM hang up the phone. If you catch me on a bad day, I'll probably do the same. However, I realize these people are just doing their job. True, they could pick a better job but lately I find myself saying "We already have service, but thank you for calling." Maybe my one decent response in the midst of hundreds of hang ups will give them a break. But just don't be calling my house phone yo. I'll get stupid with ya.

Have a great weekend my lovies!

She's a maaaaniac, maaaniac...

Ever notice how when you're bored, its nearly to tears and you can't even find a single book or magazine or tv show to get you through it, but then the next day there's so much to do your head is spinning? Happy medium people. That's all I want.

Pfft. I shouldn't complain. Keeps me from missing the Babers too much. *sniff*

I've been playing:

Every Day Kindness

I'm still participating in Every Day Kindess but I find that lately, its coming to me a little differently. Instead of trying to figure out ideas for these acts of kindness, I just make myself aware so that when an opportunity to be kind arises I'm on it!

My little sister Jenny did my hair this weekend at her place. I don't get over there often as I'm a good thirty minutes away, but I always enjoy our little visits when I do. When I walked in she looked tired. I took a quick glance around her living room and complimented her on how clean and orderly it looked. She laughed and told me that she frantically ran around picking up while I was on my way. Then she told me not to judge the appearance of her bedroom and laughed.

As I was waiting on my color to set in - yes, I color my hair occasionally - I walked into her bedroom to talk to her while she got ready for work. Now, Jen has always been a clutter bug, but this time it had gotten pretty out of control. She works more than most single parents I know and I can't imagine she has time to shower, much more keep her place spotless. I suddenly got the kindness fever...

While she fixed her hair in the bathroom, I grabbed her laundry basket and went to picking up all the clothes on the floor and other surfaces. I threw away anything that looked like trash. I hung up all her loose hangers in her closet. I grabbed glass cleaner and worked over her mirrors and windows. She looked around the corner at me and shrieked for me to stoopppp!!! but there was no stopping me! So that she wouldn't feel bad I just told her that I suddenly had the craziest urge to clean and didn't she get that way sometimes?? I told her too bad I wasn't home cuz my place could really benefit. My family has pride issues but I know how to get around them. :)

Within 10 minutes her bedroom and bathroom were spotless. I think having that extra hand really helped her get motivated. She saw me picking up and we suddenly had this funny little race going on to be the person to do the next cleaning item in need. We're tards like that.

Anyway, the photo at the top of the post is actually of my bedroom. It was a time when I was so busy that I just could not find the time to pick up after myself. I remember crying when I finally talked myself into finally doing it.

Acts of kindness are everywhere, just waiting for you to bring them to life. You just have to keep your eyes and hearts open. This weekend, my sister needed a merry maid and I was there to help her out. She thanked me of course, but the idea of her coming home from work that night to a spotless bedroom was enough for me.

Three Things I WANT

In my last meme, I couldn't figure out how to answer one of the questions:

Name 3 material things you want now.

I have my answers.

A new summer & winter closet full of clothes waiting for me when I lose my last 10 lbs. Only 8 lbs to go. *sigh* This is going so slow...

A silver omega necklace. I adore pendants and I've started making pendants to add to my Jillry collection. I would love nothing more than to have something to hang my creations on for myself. Automatic advertisement baby!

A second bedroom. Does this count? I want room for my jewelry shop, which is literally taking over my living room and dinette at the moment. It would be nice to have the extra room for a cardio machine and free weights too. :)

There you go SCG. ;) Thanks for pushing me to want for myself. I knew I had it in me! Lol.

Happy weekending everyone. ((hugs))

Another meme for your viewing pleasure

Kitty tagged me this time. As you all know, I'm a meme whore. *sniff* You love it. Gotta do it. However, I think I'll take a break after this one as the last two I've done have taken a lot of effort to answer. And I'm just to lazy right now for all this deep thinking. ;p

1: Name three things about yourself you would like to improve:

My skin. I wish that for just one day I could say "I think I'll go without make up today," and actually be confident enough to do it. I don't have acne or anything, but my cheeks always look a little like someone's grandma just went to pinching them.

My patience. I get riled up waiting in traffic and have to distract myself. I have no patience for screaming kids in supermarkets or for their parents who just keep on shopping without saying a word to them. I absolutely DO NOT DO LINES. If there's more than 3 people in line where ever I am, I simply walk out. I'm really trying to improve on this right now for several personal reasons. I hope I am successful.

My guilt issues. I know where it comes from and have been slowly getting better. I realize that I can't be responsible for other people's problems and just need to let go.

2: Name something you would like to achieve:
a) Within 1 year: Move from an apartment into a house I can call home. Or be made into an honest woman. Either one will do, I'm not picky.
b) Within 5 years: Have a successful handmade jewelry business.
c) Within 10 years: Peace. While I'm almost there now, I know in the future my plate will be full and my life totally different. I am making a goal that my "self" in the future would most likely need me to make now. Pfft. How's that for deep?

3: Name something you would like to help achieve for somebody else:
I would love to help my sister get fit & healthy. She's my little sister but seems like she's my older one at times because she's been through so much and has sort of pushed her own needs aside. I'd love to be her support and partner in a healthier lifestyle that would ultimately make her feel better about herself, not to mention tack years back onto her life.

4: Name one place you haven’t been, but you’d like to go:

Sicily. My great grandmother on my father's side came straight off the boat and I've always wanted to travel there. I hear the men are very..um,.. appreciative of women, so I'll need to invest in a head-to-toe cloak so my boyfriend won't get red in the knuckles.

5: Name one person you haven’t met, but would like to meet:
My bitty Baber child. I hope he has his Papa's eyelashes. (Or she.)

6: Name three material things you would like:
This is DANGEROUS. Okay. A boat for Babers. Well, it would be for me too. Shut up. Mmm, and a new bra. I don't like shopping for them and I need a new one right now. (Ladies, you KNOW what I'm talking about.) Like I said, I'm not picky. I would also like - man this is hard! I don't really want anything right now. Oh! An engagement ring.

OH NO YOU DI'NT!!! (Oh yes I did! Uh oh, now I'm in t-r-o-u-b-l-e. Its all your fault Kitty.)

Tagging away this time:

Kellers

Tookie

Stacie

Grilled Pizza

Mainly cuz I'm interested to see your answers. And cuz I know you be some clever chics. If I didn't tag you please go for it! I would love to get to know you better. (And duh, I love reading memes as much as I love doing them.)

My Funny Valentine

I am an awful girlfriend. *nose in corner*

Friday I was reading everyones blogs and seeing the flowers, chocolates and lingerie that my ladies were receiving on Valentines Day. I must admit it, I read and read and felt sorry for myself. I pouted. A lot.

See, J got me a new pink bluetooth device to go with my previously purchased new phone last weekend and told me it was for Valentines Day. That day I was excited about my new gizmo but a few days later felt sad that I wouldn't be spending this romantic day with him. I looked at my new pink device and missed him. I also questioned the romanticalness of a blue tooth device. (Yes, that IS a real word.)

Then on Wednesday I was surprised by two of the sweetest cards in the mail: one from Babers and one from Mini. Yes, can you believe Mini actually sent me a card? She wrote "I ruff you, Mama!" She's so clever, really. And, I won't embarrass J, but, his card brought tears to my eyes. Twice.

Back to my point - I was pouting on Friday evening. J was on his way in and even though we had dining plans for Saturday I was still a little bummed because it was kinda my idea. Hey, its J's fault really. If he hadn't started out spoiling me I wouldn't expect it. Hmph.

So I'm fresh out the shower when I hear J let himself in my place. I have my jammies on and a huge towel piled up on my head. My Aunt Jemima moment, as J puts it. I'm dropping my dirty clothes in the hamper when I turn to see J walking in the room with his wife beater on, his cap backwards and a sweet smile on his face. I gasp. In his left hand is a chilled bottle of champagne and in his right is a bouquet of a dozen beautiful red roses.

Awwwww baabbbe, I say. (At least 4 times.) Awwww...baaaabbee.

I am the worst girlfriend in the world. Just awful. I just held onto him and hugged him till I squeezed the lovin' right out of him. And then I kissed his face off.

After I gave him his goodies we sat on the couch sipping on our champagne and watched LOLCatz videos until tears came out my eyes from laughing so hard. And then I cried again because I felt so bad for wanting so much.

So yeah, I was spoiled fat ass rotten this Valentine's Day. And loved every minute of it. Don't worry guys, J gets his share of spoiling too!

Before I leave you, I must share this FRICKIN HILARIOUS video J and I were watching after our LOLCatz session Friday night. We went from laughing out loud to sitting in confused, uncomfortable silence after clicking on this film. Techno Viking. Please, I beg you - WATCH IT. If its not funny the first time, watch it again. It will come.

New Stuffs

New pretties on my jewelry site. Go see! Jillry

Just checking in. My belated Valentines Day post next. Promise. Hope everyone had as great a weekend as I did. I know, I know, you don't wanna hear about the mush. Tough titty. (Yes, I just said titty. Sorry Mom!)

Acts of Kindness

In celebration of random acts of kindness week, Claudia at EveryDayKindness started a few memes and tagged me on this one. If you are participating in random acts of kindness, please feel free to snag this cute meme!

Kind Fives
1. List five kind things you do for yourself. List five kind things you do for your closest friend, partner or child. List five kind things you have done for a stranger.
2. Tag five people.
Easy, right?

Five kind things things I do for myself:
1. No matter what I have on my to-do list when I come in from work in the evenings, I plop my butt on the couch for at least thirty minutes to unwind, relax and watch the Food Network.
2. I try to better myself. I'm a self-help junkie and read any article I can get my hands on to become a better friend, a better mate, a good employee, daughter, sister. How to be healthy, in better shape, more financially stable, etc. Being the best person I can be makes me feel better about myself and keeps my confidence in line.
3. I no longer allow myself to be victim to "toxic friends". I'm a magnet for them, but I keep myself at arms length around people in my every day surroundings that are negative.
4. I listen to music all day long. I am passionate about music and play it during work to keep me centered. Its also very calming for me on my way home from work in hellish traffic when stress is likely to creep up on me.
5. I'm always health-conscious. I try to tackle the 8 foods you should eat every day, take vitamins, do cardio, lift weights, and drink plenty of water. If you are kind to your body, it will reflect on your mood, appearance, energy level, sex drive, I can keep going if you'd like. :)

Five kind things I do for my closest friend, partner, or child:
1. I cook a big pot of something the night Jason comes in so that he’ll have at least a few days of home cooking to take back with him. I know cooking isn't his thing, so I try to help him out in this department by taking care of him even when I'm not there.
2. I always put him first. This may sound old fashioned but I can’t help it. Whether it’s hitting the hay early on the weekends cuz he’s pooped, serving his breakfast first or hanging out with his friends all day, I just do it.
3. I let him know I’m thinking of him. Text messages, emails, little calls during the day and cards in the mail. I’d want the same, wouldn’t you?
4. I never, ever speak negatively about him to anyone. Claudia listed this as one of hers, but its a big rule in my love book so I had to list it too.
5. I make myself aware of what he needs and try my best to be that for him. Sure, I'm not the beer guzzling, football lovin', sex maniac he wants me to be (kidding) but I work hard on keeping my PMS at bay, spend as much time as I can with him and really listen to him when he does open up. And give him slack when he's not reading my mind like he should be. ;)


Five kind things I have done for strangers:
1. I recently went to lunch with my sister and noticed our waitress had far too many tables to tend. As a former waitress, I'm sensitive about these things. I left her an extremely large tip and wrote the words "Great service!!" on the restaurant receipt so that her boss would see it and hopefully give her a better shift in the future.
2. I compliment people on a regular basis. Tenants that come in the office, my co-workers, frends, family, the cashier at the grocery. Even if its just "your blouse is so pretty". I know how nice it can be when I receive a compliment from a total stranger so I'm passing it on.
3. I let at least one person in line in traffic a day. There's a lot of road construction in my area and you could wait a good ten minutes just to get onto the main road some days.
4. I recently brought a ton of slighty used clothes to my local Goodwill box instead of just chunking them. Hopefully this act will reach several people in need.
5. I smile at random people. I only frequent the gym and grocery store during the week, but when I do I smile like a fool at people. Some get a little confused which only makes my smile widen. I find that the elderly are the first to smile back. I think the younger generation is more skeptical.

Again, please play along if you'd like! Have a great weekend everyone! J and I will be celebrating Valentine's Day this Saturday since we were without each other on the actual day. TGIF!

Love is in the Air

I’m going to Walmart tonight for some business card paper and grocery needs and I’ve decided to pick up a pack of Depends. Controlling my bladder when its at the point of bursting is beyond me and I’m simply tired of wrapping ten paper towels around my hand to wipe the piss and hairs off the toilet seat so I can relieve myself.

On a more uplifting note, I have two mantras for you today:

Show her that you know her.

I heard my favorite dj on KLove say this yesterday and it was the best thing I’ve ever heard anyone say about Valentines Day. It’s not about the money you spend or extravagant plans you make. Showing a woman (or man) you truly know them by doing something they would appreciate or giving them something packed with thought and sincerity really makes an impact.

For example: Playboy magazine for the hornball boyfriend; cookbook by a favorite chef for your domestic goddess; favorite chocolates for the chocoholic; a mixed cd of music he/she loves.

Really listen to what she enjoys and has interest in. Take note of what excites him. Go there.

To err is human. To forgive is divine.

I actually saw this on a bumper sticker last week. I repeated it over and over to remember it so I could share with you.

That’s it for today! I have a fun and uplifting meme to do that Claudia tagged me with that’s up next. You’re on the edge of your seats aren’t you?

At Last....

...my love has come along...

What an exhausting and lovely weekend! First things first:

I've finally put my jewelry online!! Click here to visit my shop. I have TONS more to put up but I've just found out I have triple A.D.D. and am not superwoman. *damn* I will eventually get everything up, doing some each day. I'm so excited to finally have my lovelies up!!

I have so much to report but I'm too pooped to go there now. Plus, I have lots of visiting to do. I'm afraid I've been an awful blogger. However, I've finally got internet at the homestead and promise to be a much better blogger in the future. :)

Hope everyone had as great a weekend as I did!!

Out of Pocket

Hey peeps! I've been out of pocket for the last several days and I'm pretty sure my friend Karma has something to do with it. See, I've been hijacking my neighbor's wireless internet at home for some time now and they've just moved out. Poor me, no blogging at home.... not until Friday at least. I'm finally biting the bullet and having internet installed at the apt. You know what this means. Maniac blogging and jewelry posting. Word.

I've been making pretty bobbles like crazy and I should have the jewelries up on either Ebay or Etsy by this weekend. I'm so thrilled!

And yes, I received Bella last week finally. (My Nikon D40x, duh.) I've named her Isabella, Bella for short because she's just a beautiful piece of machinery. Then of course my first digi cam got jealous and I named her too - Mini B, after Babers and because she's the smaller of the two cams. I'm sick with it, I know. Don't ask me to get help, I like being ill. It helps the creative juices. Hello, Van Gogh cut his own ear off and look at the pieces he came up with. Pfft.

I've been asked to report my progress on WW and I shall on Friday after my weigh in. I'm definitely feeling some extra room in my slacks so I'm crossing fingers for lost poundage. Can I just praise Babers for a second? Shut it, doing it anyway. You're not the boss of me.

I love my iPod.
I love my iPod.
I love my iPod.

Without my little Nano, I would not get lost in an hour of walking. I'd be counting down the minutes. Instead, I daydream as I walk to the soundtrack of my workout. I can't remember exercise before it. Maybe I should name it too?

Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.

Off to visit my lovelies. I've missed you so....