Monday, April 07, 2008

I Embarrass Myself

This evening I took a trip to the grocery store to look for a specific brand of wine that I enjoyed at my all time fav Greek and Lebanese joint. So I'm walking down the wine aisle squinting at the labels cause I've recently gone blind and I hear a voice address me.

"Ma'am, can I help you with something?" One of the guys stocking wine walks up to me and smiles. And as I'm telling him what brand I'm looking for, he smiles some more. Usually I would have been all weirded out and self conscious, but I had on a new top and was feeling quite confident thankyouverymuch. He jots my number down and tells me he'll order some and will call me when it comes in. And smiles.

I finish up my shopping and walk to my car thinking, aw, maybe he has a crush on me! That's why he was smiling at me so much. *snort* Then I get into my car and catch a glimpse of myself in the rearview mirror. Oh shite! Somehow while browsing the produce section for arugula (which by the way NO ONE IN MY CITY APPARENTLY CARRIES), a tiny piece of dark green leafy something or other found its way to my face and planted itself in my lipgloss. Oy! (<--- I'm English now, didn't you know?) So much for confidence. And now for some delightfully silly quizzes I urge you to partake in. My very mature boyfriend sent them to me at work today to fill my spare time. Pfft. Me? Spare time? I am much too important a person to need quizzes to fill my time! (Shuttap, I'm trying to get my self confidence back.)


What are your chances of surviving a Zombie Apocalypse? 37% chance of survival for me


How many five year olds could you take in a fight? I could take 15. (Jason's was 28!)


I wanna hear the results people!

13 comments:

Sean Wright said...

Embarassing is when you put on sweatpants when you have left them on the floor the previous night - and forget to take your underwear out, then ride to work, with the spare pair of undies caught over the waistband.

Rox said...

50% chance of surviving the zombie apocalypse and I could take on 17 five year olds!

I seriously thought your shirt was on backwards/inside out!

Anonymous said...

65% chance of survival. I think my lack of home handgun/shotgun/AK47 - yes we are the only household in Colorado without an AK47 - decreased my chances. Damn.

I had that happen once. I was at the salon and this gorgeous guy kept looking at me. I mean he was soooo hot. I didn't realize until later that the stylist died my eyebrows and I looked like Gracho Marx. Humble till the end....

Have you had the wine Menage a Trois? it's good.

Polgara said...

32% of surviving the zombie apocalypse and I could take on 15 five year olds!
Pol x

Tex's Missus said...

I rock....72% chance of surviving a zombie apocalypse and take on 22 kids in a fight ... actually not sure I should actually be very proud of that :)

Jill said...

sean - ouch. I hope they weren't brightly colored speedos? ;p


rox - funny you say that. I dressed in the dark the other night and had my sleep shirt on backwards AND inside out.

claudia - *snicker* reason #1 why I don't go to the salon! I love the name of that wine. I'll have to see if my grocery carries that! I saw one called "BITCH" and did a double take! Clever winos.

pol - okay, whew. Someone ranked around the same as me. I say its because we're so nice. Like for instance, J said he'd shoot his loved one in the head after gazing into their eyes longingly. I said I'd try to find a cure!

texsmissus - holy crap girl! You ranked higher than my boyfriend did on the zombie thing! You must be one tough chic. Lol!

Anonymous said...

42% chance of survival. This makes me feel good, yet challenged to do better! LOL ;-)

Texmissus scares me. I think rather than finding my family, I will try to find her and let her protect me!

Anonymous said...

oh, and I can take 17 little 5 year olds. LOL I feel ashamed...

I should be able to get more of those lil bastards! hehe

Kitty said...

I can take on 30 tiddlers in a fight!

Sorry to hear about your 'leaf'. I was in a shop just the other day and pointed out to a lady that she had a big bit of sticky tape stuck to the back of her leg. Hell, I hope someone would do the same for me! x

Nature Girl said...

I have a 53% chance of surviving a zombie apocolypse and I could take 15 kindergardners.

LOL that's too funny..youre too nice Jilly...with zombies, you have to be ruthless. In fact, the same could go for 5 year olds in some cases...LOL Did you read about the 8 or 9 third graders that plotted to attack their teacher? Yikes! Insane I tell ya!


Stacie

fatwonkkid said...

that really isn't embarrassing. I though you were gonna say your boob was hanging out. Then there would be a reason to be a bit embarrassed and would easily explain why the kid went through so much trouble to get your number and order you wine...

Marcia said...

I could take on 17 5-y/os... but my husband could take on 26! Amazing.

V said...

57% chance in a zombie apocalypse, 17 five year olds hehehe.

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